she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Randomize
