yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
Randomize