the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
