Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
25 People Reveal The Creepiest Kids They Went to School With
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
17 Subtle Body Language Signs That Reveal A Lot About Someone
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.