I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize