I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
Randomize
