just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
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