Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
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