Bisexual people are plain selfish.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
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