Duck Duck Cougar?
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
