can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Randomize
