come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
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