My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
pop tarts are not kleenex
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
