hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
Randomize
