lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
