a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Randomize