For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
Randomize
