i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
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I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?