From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
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