i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
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