So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
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