none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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