So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
