Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
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