so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
