On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
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