I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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