what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
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