and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Randomize