your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
