Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
