Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
