when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize
