just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
