Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
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