I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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