the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
Randomize
