My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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