The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
Randomize
