her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
send nudes
from the living room?
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize