I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
just found out that she named her cat after me.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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