she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
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