The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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