Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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