whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Randomize
