One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
Randomize