I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Randomize
