fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
