You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
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