Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
What a dumb baby whore.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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