WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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